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Secrets of Norfolk’s Great Bungay Wall revealed

The Editor
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Secrets of Norfolk’s Great Bungay Wall revealed

Norfolk is rich in archeological treasures, yet little is known about the Great Wall of Bungay.

This ancient structure was built by Norfolk peasants just north of Bungay – a Suffolk town close to the Norfolk border – and it is believed construction dates back to at least 1974.

Historical records show the wall was built to hold back the hordes of invaders from Suffolk, who were keen to enslave the local workforce.

Unfortunately for the Norfolk defenders, they had made the wall only 32-feet long, so the invaders simply walked around it, and it soon fell into disrepair.

Though not as long as its namesake in China, the wall is indeed impressive. Lifelong resident Malcolm Spratly, 97, said: “You can see wall all the way from that big old oak tree at top of village, I ain’t never been out of village so that’s all I know.”

Great Bungay WallThe Great Bungay Wall

Local historian Nigel Chudley is now documenting all the myths about the wall, which he has been studying for a lifetime.

“I remember in the late 70’s I was doing some research at the wall late one evening. I spotted a Vauxhall Viva parked alongside it with a man and a woman on the back seat. I started taking photos through the window, when the man jumped out of the car and started battering me.

“The charges against me were later dropped. I stopped having anything to do with the wall for a while – there were too many strange things going on for my liking.”

Visitors can go and see the remains of the wall by the A143 outside Bungay, next to the Squealing Pig children’s theme park.

Shark attacks Felixstowe windsurfer

The Editor
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Shark attacks Felixstowe windsurfer

EXCLUSIVE
By Courtney Pike, Angling Correspondent

A windsurfer had an amazing escape when a shark bit a huge chunk out of his board close to Felixstowe Pier.

Christopher Mills, 36, was surfing yesterday when something threw him off balance and into the water. As he surfaced he saw a shark swim away before disappearing beneath the waves.

Mr Mills, a recruitment consultant for an Ipswich firm, managed to scramble to shore in a panic – and only then noticed a huge chunk had been bitten from his board.

“It was terrifying,” he said. “I had heard of sharks off Cornwall but had not realised they had now moved around the coast to the North Sea. It must be global warming.

“I assume the shark was not after me because it swam off. Perhaps it thought the board was a seal or something.”

Felixstowe shark attack

He has now given his board to experts so they can establish what it was that bit it.

They say it is too early to confirm what sort of shark attacked the Suffolk surfer, but they are not ruling out a link to the Great White Shark that was spotted hunting seals off Waldringfield last summer.

Bartholomew Quint, of the UK Shark Society, said: “Our team is examining Mr Mills’ board in order to match the bite marks to a particular species. To be on the safe side, we would suggest open-water swimmers, fishermen and surfers should be extra vigilant while in the North Sea around Suffolk.”

He confirmed that the diameter of the bite mark indicated that whatever it was that chewed on Mr Mills’ surfboard was around eight-foot long.

Local woman Lorraine Fisher, 34, was also concerned that her dog had gone missing.

It later emerged that the Felixstowe mayor and police chief had clashed over the shark reports.

Local fisherman hired to catch and kill the shark.

The shark was killed, but it did not end well for the fisherman.

Third-round draw brings chance of huge FA Cup upset

The Editor
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Third-round draw brings chance of huge FA Cup upset

By Our Football Staff

A huge FA Cup upset is on the cards after the draw for the third round matched Ipswich Town with non-league Lincoln City.

Experts say that with a bit of luck, or a fluke “worldly” goal, Ipswich could sneak a shock win against the part-timers and progress to the fourth round for the first time since 2010.

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Ipswich’s cup record matches this year’s league form under manager Mick McCarthy – woeful. He insists on ridiculing cup competitions and taking loyal fans for granted by fielding inexperienced sides because he would rather concentrate on the league… which has not gone well.

In recent seasons, Town’s FA Cup record has seen them fall at the first hurdle to Portsmouth, Southampton, Preston, Hull, Aston Villa and Chelsea. The League Cup record is worse, with embarrassing defeats to Crawley, Stevenage, Carlisle and Northampton.

The stage is set, therefore, for a sure-fire win for Lincoln when the match is played at Portman Road in early January. A look at Lincoln’s recent form, in all competitions, is slightly different to Ipswich’s stuttering season. The Lincoln results are:

W W D D W D W W W D W W W W W

Meanwhile, Ipswich have failed to strong two wins together all season, are languishing in 15th position in the Championship with relegation a real danger, and in McCarthy have a manager who, when asked how could things improve, said: “By keeping playing the way we are.”

An Ipswich fan said: “It’s all very predictable – we will get dumped out of the cup by non-league opposition so we can concentrate on relegation.”

But there is always the chance of a cup upset, with Ipswich sneaking a win by catching Lincoln on an off day. Bookies have made Lincoln, a team made up of postmen, a fishmonger and a shoe salesman, red-hot favourites for the tie.

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Original Batman was fat old bloke with beard

The Editor
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Original Batman was fat old bloke with beard

He’s portrayed by Hollywood as a muscle-bound superhero and idolised by millions of fans worldwide, but we can reveal the original Batman was a fat old bloke with a bushy beard.

Until now it was assumed Batman was a fictional creation for DC Comics in 1939 who went on to star in a 1960s television series before launching the cult film franchise in 1989.

But a Suffolk Gazette investigation has discovered the inspiration for the character was the true story of Bill Smith, who moved from Suffolk in England to America in 1870 and settled in New York where he worked in a butcher’s shop.

We researched historical records in East Anglia and the US to piece together the remarkable story of how Mr Smith turned vigilante after his shop was repeatedly targeted by shoplifters.

Who is the real batman?

Municipal archives show Mr Smith was first indicted in 1878 for catching and punching a thief who had run out of the shop with a leg of lamb over his shoulder.

Mr Smith, then aged 43, was set free by the sympathetic judge, who was no doubt fed up with the never-ending list of petty criminals being hauled up before him.

The episode inspired Mr Smith who, according to parish records, had left Dallinghoo in Suffolk where he worked as a farm labourer to board a liner from Liverpool to New York to seek a better life.

Spurred on by a one-paragraph report of his court appearance in the New-York Tribune, he went on to tackle more thieves and soon gained notoriety as a vigilante.

It took four more years for him to adopt his famous head mask – to make him look like a bat and to hide his real identity. He then patrolled his neighbourhood by night looking for baddies.

Original Batman

Extracts from a journal, written by an associate known only as Robin in 1892, included the exclusive photograph we are publishing above for the first time today.

The journal discloses: “Everyone locally has heard of this Batman. He walks the streets at night and the gangsters, the thieves, the drunkard vagrants all keep their distance.”

It adds: “He is the vengeance. He is the night. He is Batman.”

But that is where the original Batman trail goes cold, with the only remaining documents about Mr Smith being his death certificate. We pulled a copy from the central records office in New York, which states he died of hypothermia after being out alone on a freezing night in February 1896, aged 66.

It is now certain the creators of the Batman character for DC Comics – Rob Kane and Bill Finger – based him on the local legend of Mr Smith.

And so, as you watch yet another Batman movie with your family, you can now recount how Batman was, in fact, a farm labourer from Suffolk, England.

The perfect gift mug

Try one of our mug gift ideas from our partner Dirty Old Goat…

Hospital parking to cost arm and a leg

The Editor
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Hospital parking to cost arm and a leg

By Phil Ward, Health Correspondent

West Suffolk Hospital has opened an extra operating theatre to remove an arm and a leg from visitors forced to pay the new hospital car park charges.

Health bosses have raised parking costs to an eye-watering £2 an hour, meaning a four-hour stay will now cost £8 instead of the previous charge of just £4.80.

One hospital visitor said: “It will now officially cost an arm and a leg to park at the hospital in Bury St Edmunds to visit my mother every day as she recovers from an operation.

“Fortunately, West Suffolk Hospital has thought about this and set up a new operating theatre to enable it to remove those limbs from drivers with as little fuss as possible.”

Health chiefs insist motorists who do not want to pay an arm and a leg can instead take out a pay-day loan.

A spokesman said: “We are in early talks with Wonga and other loan companies about sponsoring the car park. There has been a lot of interest – about 5,000%, in fact.”

Annual rail fare increase arrives on time

The Editor
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Annual rail fare increase arrives on time

By Casey Jones, Railways Correspondent

Today’s 2.3% rail fare increase arrived more promptly than any trains did this year, passengers agree.

The ticket price rise, way above the 0.9% Consumer Price Index inflation rate, was also more predictable than any service offered to stressed customers of the Greater Anglia rail franchise.

Commuter Johnny Walker said: “The punctuality and reliability statistics for the Greater Anglia service are shocking. Passengers can never be sure if their trains will run, and what time they will arrive at their destination.

“However, the one thing all the train companies are very good at is ensuring the annual fare increase arrives bang on time.”

Rail fare increase arrives on timeTaken for a ride: rail fares rise above inflation again
The latest increase means the price of a standard annual season ticket from Ipswich to London will rise £165 to a whopping £7,325, plus any extra for onward London Underground journeys.

A rail insider said: “You might expect customers would get a reliable and punctual service for that sort of money. But never mind.”

Danny Dyer buys Lord of East Anglia title

The Editor
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Danny Dyer buys Lord of East Anglia title

Danny Dyer as a King

EastEnders star Danny Dyer poses as the King of England after a BBC documentary revealed he is a direct descendant of Royalty.

The Cockney actor posted the photograph on his Facebook account and revealed he had bought the Lord of East Anglia title to celebrate his new-found heritage.

Who Do You Think You Are?, the popular family history documentary, proved that Dyer was not only a direct descendant of Thomas Cromwell, who was Henry XIII’s fearsome right-hand man, but also of Edward III and on to William the Conqueror.

Down-to-earth Dyer, who lives in Essex, visited Suffolk to discover his ancestors also lived at Otley Hall – and he was related to Lord Tollemache, who owns nearby Helmingham Hall. “He even has a drawbridge,” Dyer remarked on the show.

A pal said: “Danny is a right old proper East End boy, so he was amazed to find out his family history. He thought it would be a right touch to buy a title because he really is a toff now.

“The Lord of East Anglia title was available for £20,000, so he snapped it up. It does not entitle him to anything, but he can now be a Lord officially!”

It is not clear whether Danny, 39, who plays Mick Carter running the Queen Vic pub in Albert Square, can now be called Lord Dyer in the programme credits or demand a pay rise.

The Anita Bush Christmas gift guide

The Editor
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The Anita Bush Christmas gift guide

By Anita Bush, Gardening Editor

Well, dear readers, with Christmas nearly upon us I have turned my back on the frosty garden and don’t intend to venture out until it’s time to harvest the Brussels sprouts from the allotment to go with the turkey. And, luckily for you I decided to go shopping instead.

What an array of gifts I found out there and on the internet. As not everyone you are buying for is a keen gardener, I have offered you a comprehensive list of elegant presents which will make you popular with everyone from the baby in the family to the maiden aunt.

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I have chosen wisely, and although the ideas are sophisticated, there is something to suit every pocket. You will not find a list like this in those ordinary newspapers. Again, the Suffolk Gazette gives you the best in British journalism today. So, here is my list, or you could just buy a mug from the Suffolk Gazette, of course…

Things to do in NorfolkIn this case, you can judge a book by its cover

A BOOK FOR YOUR ADVENTUROUS ONES
This superb four-page guide to the county of Norfolk is stuffed with things to do… like a visit to the defunct ancient home of that long-forgotten tribe, Norwich City Football Club, or a paddle at Yarmouth with a hanky tied on your head. Or you could spend an hour stuck in the reeds in a boat on the Norfolk Broads. Well that’s about it really. But there is also a lovely photo of a broken windmill. This rare tome is available for about £1.50 from one of those dusty old antiquarian bookshops that smell like a stale custard pie.

iced-biscuitsSpend pounds, pile on pounds

EIGHT CALORIE-PACKED BISCUITS FOR JUST £17.50
Your gardening pals or relatives will adore these fruit and vegetable shaped iced biscuits which taste even better than the real thing. Perfect with a glass of Christmas sherry, these nibbles are laden with healthy calories and will give the recipient the energy to get out to that Weight Watchers meeting on a cold night. At just £17.50 for eight, they are almost as pricey as a second-hand car but well worth it. Order them from Not On The High Street.com or get the kids to try making some with bogies and jumper fluff for just the cost of the ingredients.

Nigel Farage pillow caseSleep with Nigel

THE NIGEL FARAGE PILLOWCASE
Would you like to take Nigel Farage to bed? Or have a pillow fight with him? Well here is your chance with this item of deluxe bedding, which will add that touch of elegance to your bedroom or even add value to your home after Brexit. It is washable so that tear stains can be removed, or any other stains that might crop up. Priced at just £8.99, this gift is available on eBay UK.

Willy strawsStocking filler

WILLY-SHAPED DRINK STRAWS
Fun for all the family if you give one of these sophisticated Willy-shaped drinking straws to your maiden aunt to sip her snowball cocktail through. Of course the joke will be on you if she doesn’t know what it is! Just £1.25 a pack of six (no, not a pack of three) from Party Delights website.

Fidel Castro bearHave a Fidel in bed

FIDEL CASTRO TEDDY BEAR
For the child in the family you don’t like, the plush Fidel Castro Teddy Bear is a fine souvenir of the murderous Cuban dictator who recently died. The bear can be yours for £15.50 from CafePress website.

Leather knee padsKneasy does it

KINKY LEATHER KNEE PADS
Fitting all knee sizes, these comfy leather pads are the ideal for the gardener, or dogger in your family. With a soft protective inner they are perfect for weeding or committing sexual acts in the long grass with comfort and precision. Available from The Worm That Turned website at just £29.99.

Carrot holderWinter warmer

THE ULTIMATE CARROT OR COURGETTE STORAGE UNIT
A perfect gift for a fellow gardener, this carrot holder is ideal for these cold days when you need to prevent freezing. It can also be used for storing a courgette. If you are strapped for cash, you could get granny to crochet it for you, by adapting a Willy Warmer knitting pattern. Suitable for vegans. This carrot gift cannot be returned after use. For over-18s only. Available from Etsy.com at around £10.

Leaf grabScoop up a bargain

SANTA CLAWS!
Just the thing for your gardening friend to gather a large amount of leaves or compost in one go, thus saving time and energy. These fabulous, elegant leaf grabbers are also useful for pinching the bottom of a very fat person or grabbing all the Doritos at a buffet. They can also be used as flippers in event of flooding. £8.99 from Greenkey Garden and Home Ltd.

Donald Trump hand soapGrope on a rope

THE DONALD TRUMP APPROVED GROPE ON A ROPE
This soap reaches the those difficult spots while you are in the shower. Or perfect for grabbing a bit of pussy. This good, clean fun gift is £5.95 from IWOOT. Or Trump Towers Gift Shop, New York.

Hand vacuumWhat a relief for grandad

THE BLACK AND PECKER HANDY HAND TOOL
A great gift for grandad or single men, this Black and Pecker vacuum may seem pricey at around £75 but it boasts extra strong suction, reaches the parts other hand vacs can’t and your hands don’t touch the dirt. Available under the counter at all good electrical shops.

Wine is the Best MedicineThe real Christmas spirit

MY FAVOURITE HEALTH BOOK
With the trend for health books and blogs, I thought I would let you in on this book of natural remedies. My husband and I swear by it. By that we mean it’s fecking brilliant. We make yoush of it three timeshh a day with mealsh. It even hash cureshh for liver diseashh. And despression. And alcolohizm. Copiesh are now rare asz mosht people left them down the pub but if you are lucky you might find one on Amazhon.

anita-bush-signature
That’s it. Hopefully this has given you some cool ideas for this festive season – remember to buy a Suffolk Gazette mug as well!

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