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Norfolk people hoarding lightbulbs in case of power cuts

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Norfolk lightbulb madness
Norfolk shopping madness

The residents of Norfolk have been panic buying lightbulbs in case there are power cuts.

Shops across the rural backwater county are running short of bulbs as the hoarding continues.

Electricity sector spokesperson Lorraine Fisher, 34, said: “Most of Norfolk isn’t even connected to the grid.

“This probably explains why so many people there don’t quite understand how power cuts work.

“Goodness knows what they’ll do with their cupboards-full of light bulbs.”

Dereham vicar the Rev Evan Elpuss said he had been praying for his flock’s souls.

“This lightbulb panic buying shows many are beyond help. Most of them still use candles anyway as they don’t believe in electickery.”

The 5pm Suffolk Gazette joke to keep your spirits up

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I used to be addicted to swimming.

But I’m proud to say I’ve been dry for five years.

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The 4.30pm Suffolk Gazette joke to keep your spirits up

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I came up with a new word yesterday.

Plagiarism.

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The 4pm Suffolk Gazette joke to keep your spirits up

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To whoever stole my Microsoft Office software account, I will come after you.

You have my Word.

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The 3.30pm Suffolk Gazette joke to keep your spirits up

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I said to the gym instructor: “Can you teach me to do the splits?”

He said: “How flexible are you?”

I said: “I can’t make Tuesdays.”

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The 3pm Suffolk Gazette joke to keep your spirits up

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A neighbour of mine is entering the world’s tightest hat competition.

I just hope he can pull it off.

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The 2.30pm Suffolk Gazette joke to keep your spirits up

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A friend of mine always wanted to be run over by a steam train.

When it happened, he was chuffed to bits!

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The 2pm Suffolk Gazette joke to keep your spirits up

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I saw a documentary about how ships are kept together.

It was riveting.

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