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Rude bingo calls – say what?

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Bingo can be a fun game for many reasons and players find that there is a lot to like about it. In addition to being a good opportunity to win a considerable amount of money, players also find it appealing due to the social element.

Since the game arrived on British shores during the 1950s, it has steadily increased in popularity over the decades, with hundreds of bingo halls around the country, while you can also find many bingo venues at traditional seaside holiday resorts.

Despite this, there are also many different sites that bingo players can visit online and these can be attractive due to the different bingo bonuses available, such as at BingoSites.net for example, which shows all of the best ones.

Arguably one of the most familiar elements of bingo that many people identify with is the bingo calls, which can provide a talking point, while there are some that elicit moments of levity, with some considered borderline rude.

Let’s take a look at what some of these are and see if you can recognise any as you read through!

Two Fat Ladies

Perhaps one of the most memorable bingo calls, this refers to the number 88 and for many automatically conjures up an image of two sizeable ladies. Ask all bingo fans which call they would remember the most and this more than likely would be in their top three!

Garden Gate

While this might seem like an obvious one, there could perhaps be some dual meaning associated with this one which could refer to being a collective slang term for a female’s, er, private region. The number that is associated with it is the number ‘8’ which also rhymes with ‘gate’.

Stop Farting

We do not know the reason for this being associated with the number ‘83’ – there appears to be no logical connection, however, it is certainly a bingo call that you would no doubt make you do a double-take if it is the first time you heard it!

Let’s Procreate

A bingo call that can be used to describe ‘78’, this no doubt gets some laughs, if not awkward ones from players when during a bingo game.

J-Lo’s Bum

Referring to the global megastar artist, Jennifer Lopez who is known very well for one of her physical attributes that have attracted the attention of many over the years. This has been used to describe the number ‘71’, for no other reason than that it rhymes.

Did You Score?

This has been known to refer to the number ‘24’ due to its rhyming association and is the equivalent of being asked if you were successful in the pursuit of a romantic interest. That is at least the cleanest way that we can describe it anyway!

How often can Bingo Calls change?

You might find that all bingo calls differ depending on where you play, though over the last few decades, these have been tweaked over the years. There are some that never seem to change though and have almost an iconic status, such as ‘two fat ladies’.

Inevitably, there will always be some that do not catch on and once heard the first time, may never be repeated.

Man falls off his bicycle in Norfolk

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man falls off bike in Norfolk

By Ian Bred, Norfolk Correspondent

A man has fallen off his bicycle while riding in Norfolk, it has emerged.

Albert Smith, 73, pictured above, was minding his own business pedaling along a path near the village of Yaxham when the mishap occurred.

Mr Smith, a former poultry farm labourer, was thankfully unhurt when he tipped over on his right side after coming into contact with a large hole.

The incident was witnessed by Betty Jo Spuckler, 46, who lives in nearby Dereham with her brother and their eight children.

She rushed over to help the gentleman get up and dust himself down.

Fortunately he and his bicycle were none the worse for the ordeal, and he was able to continue on his way to Dereham market to buy a rabbit for his tea.

“I was a lucky old boy,” he told the Suffolk Gazette today. “I thought I was done for.”

Sergeant Lorraine Fisher, 34, from Norfolk police, said officers had not been called to attend the accident but admitted this was probably the most exciting that had happened in Norfolk this week.

Writing a business research paper – tips for college

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One of the most frustrating things for any college student is writing well-researched business papers to impress professors. During your time in college, there will be different projects, each with varying degrees of complexity. When it comes to the business research paper, you will be expected to use credible data and examples to strengthen arguments.

While some students have mastered the art of essay writing, others struggle to create coherent documents. Worried about your assignments? Not sure how to create the best research paper for your business project? Don’t panic. In this article, we offer useful insights on how to write quality research papers.

  • Read and Understand the Instructions

The easiest way to get started on your business research paper is to make sure that you know your professor’s expectations. Each project students are asked to work on comes with a set of instructions. The grade you get for the business project will depend, to a large extent, on how well you address the research questions. So, before sitting down to get started on your project, make sure you understand precisely what is expected. Read the prompt to get a clear picture of the content, formatting, citation, and style requirements.

  • Prepare Well and Create a Plan

Most likely, there will be times when you will have more than one project to complete within a short span. To avoid procrastination and ensure that each project is accorded enough time, you need to plan well. Prioritize your tasks, starting with the most urgent projects before proceeding to those with relatively more time.

Don’t postpone what you can start working on right away. Most importantly, understand that research papers are written in stages, and allocate enough time for research, writing, editing, and proofreading. You can get assignment help on such online platforms as geeks and gamers twitter.

  • Choose an Interesting Topic

Sometimes, instructors give students specific topics on which they are expected to research and write their papers. While this may seem to limit, it ensures that you adhere to a specific topic area. However, most of the time, you will be allowed room to select a topic for your own paper.

Make sure to adhere to the specific guidelines provided in your prompt. The best topics are narrow, specific, and interesting. As you choose topics, pick something that your readers will find interesting.

  • Brainstorm for Ideas

One of the most important stages when writing a business research paper is brainstorming. This is the process of writing down whatever you can think about concerning the topic. The notes you create during the session can be used for outlining.

  • Create an Outline

Most students ignore outlining, assuming that it is not important to the writing process. In truth, however, outlining serves the same purpose for writers as recipes do for chefs. It guides the research process, making sure that you don’t miss important points. A good outline also ensures that you don’t stray from the core subject of your business project. You can choose between a topic outline and a sentence outline, depending on your project’s nature.

  • Research Widely

The next step in the writing process is data collection. Regardless of the type of assignment you are asked to write, it is always a good idea to use credible evidence and examples to support your ideas. Of course, professors want to see evidence of independent and original thinking. However, as you present your points, remember to anchor your work on the body of established knowledge in your field. The best sources are credible, peer-reviewed, and recent.

  • Start Writing Early

Although it is good to prepare, make sure to leave enough time actually to write your paper. Since you will need to create multiple drafts, start as early as possible. Also, don’t spend time during the first draft checking typos and mistakes. The best practice is to write first and come back to edit later. Most importantly, organize your writing into sections and subsections, using paragraphs to present your ideas and arguments. Make sure to cite all your sources.

  • Edit and Proofread

If you truly want to ace that business research paper, create enough time for proofreading and editing. Many students fail their academic projects because they rush to submit their work without checking for grammar and spelling mistakes. Spend some time reading through your paper multiple times. As you edit, check for content and formatting consistency.

Here, we have offered a few tips for college students on how to create the best business research papers. Plan well, and do not procrastinate.

Container ships cut in size to prevent Suez Canal traffic jams

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World's smallest container ship
New, smaller container ships will prevent traffic jams

New laws will make huge container ships drastically smaller to prevent a repeat of the hold-ups in the Suez Canal this week.

The Evergreen ran aground in the Suez Canal, blocking it and creating the world’s longest traffic jam. Essential cargo is now being held up for days.

Ships have been getting larger by the year as greedy transport tycoons seek to make bigger profits.

But now maritime officials have had enough.

They are recommending new laws that allow each vessel to carry just one container, like the one pictured above arriving at the Port of Felixstowe this week.

It means ships can pass each other on the Suez Canal without issue and will improve delivery times between Asia and Europe, meaning your new 75-inch television on Amazon will arrive faster.

The chaos in the Suez Canal will never be repeated with smaller container ships
The chaos in the Suez Canal will never be repeated with smaller container ships

Freight logistics expert Lorraine Fisher, 34, explained: “These new boats are ideal for nipping across the oceans and delivering our goods fast and realiably.

“There will be no more hold-ups in the Suez Canal like we have seen this week – you can get 50 of these smaller ships side by side and there would still be enough room for more.”

International Maritime Law Group is now working on making the new ships sizes mandatory, and have indicated shipbuilders should start making more of them now.

“There is an opportunity for shipbuilding industries to make a name for themselves again.”

Buy a mug – they don’t come from China

Luckily, our brilliant Suffolk Gazette mugs are made right here in Suffolk and are not currently stuck in the queue at the Suez Canal. So, browse our full collection on the Dirty Old Goat mugs website, or buy direct from the items below.

Determining if you are financially ready to begin a business

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The journey toward entrepreneurship can be an exciting time, but if you do not have the proper financial support, you might face regrets.

Luckily, if you follow the right preparation steps, you’ll have more responsibility for your future. These steps can help you become financially stable and ready to proceed.

Save as Much as You Can

It’s often difficult to control your cash flow when beginning your company. Not all your clients might want to pay you, and it’s often hard to find customers in the first place. And whether purchasing equipment or getting licenses, you’ll often face unanticipated costs. Having some money set aside in your bank account is a great asset to help you through the tough times. It will give you peace of mind about your finances, eliminating stress.

You might consider refinancing your student loans, which creates a new payment. That way, you can free up more money to either invest in your business or put into your savings account. Using a student loan refinance calculator, you can know what to expect payments to be once you make repayments.

Several factors impact how much you’ll need to set aside. That includes the amount you plan on spending each month and whether you have any options to fall back on, like a partner with money. But in general, it’s best to save about three or more months of living expenses. If you can, you might try to build up a year’s worth.

Understanding Taxes

When determining if you are financially ready to open your company full-time, think about self-employment taxes. They’re much different from if you had a job with an employer since taxes are automatically deducted. A portion is paid for you. With a W-9 job, you just have to file a return at the end of each year, and you might get a small refund.

But with self-employment, you’ll need to file once every quarter, and you’ll have to pay somewhat higher taxes. Plus, you might need to pay extra taxes for the business. Do your research to understand the obligations and ensure that you have the funds to meet them. You might consider hiring an accountant to help you know the ins and outs of the process.

Considering Possible Customers

Think about whether you have enough potential work to help you transition full-time to running the new company. It is much easier to go full-time when you have enough customers ready to purchase your service or product. If you would need to do some marketing, you need to work that into the budget.

If you need to do any marketing, consider your rate of success and what your goals are. Do you hear back 25 percent of the time or only 5 percent? Think about the current clients and how much effort is necessary to scale up your operations. That way, you can make better timing decisions. For instance, perhaps you will decide to do more marketing before going full-time, so you have enough projects ready to start.

Winnie the Pooh arrested for indecent exposure

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Let it all hang out: Winnie the Pooh with no pants or trousers
Let it all hang out: Winnie the Pooh

By Hugh Dunnett, Crime Correspondent

Children’s entertainer Winnie the Pooh was behind bars last night for refusing to wear any underwear or trousers.

The bear always sports a small red tee-shirt but stubbornly wanders around with nothing underneath.

Police were called by concerned parents who feared the book, film and television star was trying to lure children in some kind of honeypot trap.

Officers detained Winnie the Pooh at his home in Hundred Acre Wood near Saxmundham, Suffolk at 4.30pm yesterday after reports he had gone to the Co-Op wearing nothing but his tight red shirt.

Suffolk police spokesperson Sergeant Lorraine Fisher, 34, said: “We can confirm we arrested a bear for indecent exposure.

“He is currently in police custody and is expected to appear before magistrates in the morning.”

However, naturists were furious about the arrest. Steve Walshe, 43, said: “Winnie the Pooh should be allowed to let it all hang out.

“It’s only natural.”

It is thought Winnie the Pooh fans couldn’t care less about his lack of underpants. They love buying Winnie the Pooh gear on Amazon.

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Mother of God! Supt Hastings becomes a priest called Father Ted

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Father Ted: Supt Ted Hastings’ new life

By Hugh Dunnett, Crime Correspondent

Superintendent Ted Hastings has left AC 12 and become a priest in the new series of Line of Duty, we can reveal.

Supt Hastings is so gutted at being under suspicion in the gripping crime drama that he leaves his glittering career behind and is now known as Father Ted.

Viewers watch aghast as the Ulsterman exclaims: “Mother of God! I told you I was innocent, so I did.”

He then walks out of the station and the scene cuts to him relaxing in his new parish rectory in a village near Bury St Edmunds in Suffolk.

There he tends to the needs of an elderly flock and helps out at local old folks homes.

Television critic Lorraine Fisher, 34, said: “Nobody saw this coming. Everyone assumes Supt Hastings is ‘H’, the high-ranking police officer leading an organised crime gang.

“But there is a huge twist because he runs off to the church and now enjoys a new Godly life in rural Suffolk, where he is known as Father Ted.”

Viewers can see it act out for themselves in the cliffhanger series on BBC1. Maybe buy a massive new 75-inch television from Amazon to enjoy it all the more.

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Cows produce more milk listening to Ed Sheeran songs

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A Suffolk farmer has revealed his dairy herd produces 50% more milk if he plays Ed Sheeran music to them. It’s their favourite moosic.

Potato and dairy farmer Maurice Piper says his cows love Ed Sheeran songs so much that milk production has rocketed.

“I don’t know why it is but they love Ed Sheeran, and his music plays on a loop in the dairy shed at milking time.

“I personally can’t stand his music. But if it increases my profits, who am I to argue?”

Mr Piper said the Ed Sheeran revelation was discovered by accident.

“One of my farmhands, Angus Hereford was supervising the milking one day when he had his iPhone music on the speaker, playing Ed Sheeran’s new album.

“The cows ears pricked up and you could see more milk coming out straight away.

“We experimented with other music. from classical and country music to rap, but nothing else worked. In fact, we tried heavy metal and it had the opposite effect – production went down.”

Mr Piper and his team have now installed speakers in the milking shed so that each of his cows can hear their favourite Ed Sheeran songs, which the team purchase on Amazon.

But staff now wear headphones because they are udderly fed-up listening to Sheeran, who lives just 10 miles away from Mr Piper’s farm near Woodbridge in Suffolk.

Ed Sheeran’s PR person Lorraine Fisher, 34, said: “Ed’s song’s appeal to everyone but we wouldn’t want to milk it.”

Here are some more moosical stars we think cows would enjoy:

  • Cream
  • Full Fatboy Slim
  • Muse
  • Four Bottle Tops
  • Supergrass
  • The Moove
  • Simply Red Poll