Friday, December 9, 2022

Latest Stories

coc’n’nuts bouncy castle fit for a king dong

coc’n’nuts bouncy castle fit for a king dong
coc’n’nuts bouncy castle

A suffolk town Saxmundham is all set for Christmas with a giant naughty bouncy castle.

Pornofruit Greengrocers of Saxmundham, Suffolk – which featured in the Suffolk Gazette in October. Making the news again in the run-up to Xmas. We reported on the iconic ‘sperm-slide’ that the kinky purveyor of fruit & veg had installed in its kids’ playground to keep the little ones from getting under their horny parent’s feet as they shopped.Now, with Christmas ‘round the corner, the pervy provider of erotic food has gone one better this time with a giant con’n’nuts bouncy castle.

Customers visiting the store yesterday were amazed and slightly overwhelmed at the sight of a giant bouncy castle. Endowed with a 12ft inflatable male member and two enormous squishy testicles. The playground attraction, dubbed ‘coc’n’nuts’ castle’ by regulars made an instant splash as children,.some as young as three, happily climbed, and swung off of the oversized cock and bounced on the nuts while their adults neglectfully shopped inside.

Shagging on a bouncy castle

Pornofruit owner & manageress, Lolita Feelgood (65) told this reporter ”Since you last came,.business has been steady but with Xmas coming we thought we could benefit from a promotion. The ‘coc’n’nuts castle’ fits well with our brand which is all about fruit, veg, nuts, and shagging etc. So we’re very happy with it.”

Christmas is cumming

This reporter asked Feelgood if she had any special products in store this Christmas? “The new range of ‘big, fat green cocks’ (cucumbers) is selling well and we are expanding the veg range with Xmas.classics like Brussels Sprouts which we are marketing as ‘Elfs’ Gonads’.

Nuts are popular this time of year and we have the full selection which we are selling in small sacks as – you guessed it – ‘Reindeer Nuts’. In the fruit department, we are paying tribute to the big man who endures freezing temperatures in his draughty sleigh each year, with our ‘Santa’s Frosted Goolies’ which are prunes (shriveled plums) dusted with sugar. Pop a couple of those in your mouth and it’ll really get the Christmas party started!”

Happy Christmas to the customers and staff of Pornofruit, Saxmundham!

🤞 Get our stories on email

We don’t spam! Read more in our privacy policy

close

Oh hi there 👋
It’s nice to meet you.

Sign up to receive awesome content, weekly in your inbox.

We don’t spam! Read our Privacy Policy for more info.

Follow us onSocial Media

55,401FansLike
9,931FollowersFollow

LATEST STORIES

Most Read