Friday, March 1, 2024

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Putting the bins out has become the most exciting moment of the week

putting the bins out now the most exciting moment of the week

Putting the wheelie bins out has become the week’s most exciting moment for lockdown Britain, it has emerged.

The routine is now the only chance anyone gets to see something of the outside world.

Couples are so keen to do the “chore” that they now squabble about who gets to do it.

Lorraine Fisher, 34, said: “I’m now working from home. Our food is delivered by the supermarket so I never leave these four walls. It’s like a prison.

“Bin day is like day release. I get to go outside for a fleeting moment and there is even the possibility that I might see and interact with a human being, other than my useless partner, Steve.”

Steve Walshe, 43, said bin day was a man’s job and Lorraine should stop moaning.

“I look forward to it,” he explained.

“I take as long as I can to drag the general waste bin out to the pavement, where I linger for perhaps a little longer than I should in case I catch sight of another human.

“I’m even happy to chat to Beryl, the mad old lady at number 72 who has eight cats.

“Every other Tuesday is perfect because I get to take two bins out, the paper waste and the organic waste. That’s two trips and I can make that last 40 minutes if I really put my mind to it.”

Lorraine butted in: “If he put as much effort into the things that need doing around the house he might not be so miserable.”

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