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Suffolk man invents cure for liver diseases with Listerine

Suffolk man invents cure for liver disease
Suffolk man invents cure for liver disease

A genius man in Suffolk has invented a remedy to cure liver diseases with orange juice and listerine.

When President Trump suggested that injecting disinfectant inside people could be a treatment for coronavirus. It wasn’t the first time home cures and remedies for serious conditions have been promoted and suggested to the gullible or desperately ill.

Invented in 1851, Gripe Water was prescribed to babies with teething pains or colic. With an alcohol content of up to 9%, it’s hardly surprising that the babas felt better after a few spoonfuls.

Drinking one’s own urine has also long been considered a healthy pass time. Despite there being no scientific evidence to support the idea. It certainly isn’t a cure for halitosis (bad breath).although that didn’t stop the Romans from using their piss (which is yellow) to aid teeth whitening. Idiots.

Liver diseases are now curable

Now, an amateur scientist from Chillesford, East Suffolk has posted a Tok ToK video claiming that Listerine Coolmint Antibacterial Mouthwash can ‘clean the liver’. and act as ‘a cure for alcohol-related liver diseases’. Hmmmmm.

We decided to test the theory…

Bob, the security guard at the Suffolk Gazette head office is clearly an alcoholic with serious liver diseases. He has all the usual symptoms: blotchy red face, bloodshot piggy eyes, trembling hands,.a wobbly gait, and, most telling of all, he opens his mouth to speak about 5 seconds before he actually says anything.

This reporter, and a couple of the editorial Staff took Bob down to the White Horse in town,.and lined up a pint with a Southern Comfort chaser on the bar in front of him. After distracting him for a moment by gesturing towards landlady Carols’ fit ass,.Terry & I spiked both his drinks with mouthwash from the travel-sized bottles of Listerine we had secreted in our coat pockets. All we had to do now was wait.

Four and a half hours later…

Wl. Weev bin in th PUB forabpout FiVe hours nooooow.  I am     totally WANKRD. tErry has GHone round the back with CARol aND is Givin HER wun up ThE SHitTer. Bob IS Still seated AT t he BAAAAArR and LoOks fine Tommy. Either LISteriNe Izzz acure For CANCER , errrr, I MeAN AlcoHoLismmmm, orrrrr It MAked IT WORSE!?!!

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