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Elderly man beating older man to take on pensioner for White House job

Three old men

Three very old men are locked in a battle to take on perhaps the most stressful job in the world, it has emerged.

Democrat Joe Biden, 77, seems likely to beat Bernie Sanders, 78, for the right to fight Donald Trump, 73, for the White House.

It is now law in the US for Presidential hopefuls to be male, very old and implausibly out of touch with normal people.

US political commentator Lorraine Fisher, 34, said: “Even though I am female and young – I am 34 – I am qualified to comment on this.

“The US political system is bizarre. We have a 78-year-old heart attack victim who would be 79 by the time he took office, and 87 if he won two terms.

“I’ve seen people in their late eighties, and they should be putting their feet up with a cup of tea, not trying to run the world.”

Biden seems likely to win the Democratic race to run for President next November after a successful Super Tuesday.

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