Saturday, October 1, 2022

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As Theresa May dithers over resignation, Cabinet hires her a new driver

Theresa May’s Cabinet colleagues have generously hired her a new chauffeur.

New driver

The new driver, pictured above, is described as a “safe pair of hands” on the road as the Prime Minister negotiates a traumatic few days.

Rumours of her resignation tonight went unfounded, but she is now expected to reveal her proposed leaving date after a crunch meeting with the leader of the 1922 Committee on Friday.

However, political insiders say Cabinet colleagues, pushed by Tory MPs and grassroots members, have decided to “hurry things along” by changing Mrs May’s driver.

Downing Street carpool expert Lorraine Fisher, 34, said: “They want the Prime Minister gone and when her normal driver went down with a mystery bug, they swiftly appointed a replacement.

“Eyebrows were raised by security teams because the new man, known as Phil, looked a little old.

“But he seems to know his way around London and is respected for his diplomatic behaviour. So, he’s starting tomorrow.

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