The A1214 ring road around Ipswich is hard enough to navigate at the best of times. Now with the completion of the new Blondie roundabout, things have gone from bad to worse.
The Suffolk Gazette had received numerous reports from bewildered drivers concerned at the confusing directions on the signage at the rotunda. Umpteen motorists have told how they have taken wrong turns. Driven around in circles, and ended up going the wrong way because of the unusual and amusing directions.
Blondie Ipswich dates cancelled
Based on the 1978 hit record ‘one way or another’ by iconic, new wave pop group. Blondie, the signpost instructs road-users to drive ‘one way’ ‘or another’ in pursuit of ‘finding and getting’ an unidentified individual. Possibly a love interest. It is not known whether any of the Blondie band members including lead singer, Debbie Harry have ever driven on the A1214.
In other pop/travel news
Aging British soft-rocker, Chris Rea has announced via his Twitter account that he will be driving home for Christmas. Via the newly resurfaced A66 from Darlington to Middlesbrough a.k.a. ‘The road to hell”.
In the US, Talking Heads lead singer, David Byrne is reported to be traveling across America in a 1986 Winnebago motorhome on the road to nowhere. We’ll let you know when he gets there.
Can you name any other classic pop and rock road journeys?
Saxmundham, a market town in suffolk has opened its new kiddies’ playground.
Pornofruit Greengrocers of Saxmundham, Suffolk – recently featured in the Suffolk Gazette – has been showing off its new playground. The £12,000, state-of-the-art-of-lovemaking play area has been provided to allow horny parents to shop for groceries. Without having to drag their annoying, complaining children around, spoiling the sexy, adult atmosphere within the store.
‘No-kids’ wedding
Ex-Anne Summers shop manageress, Lolita Feelgood (65) told this publication: ”We have a lot of men, gays and lezzers coming into our store. Many of them mums and therefore there can be a lot of unwanted kids and toddlers wandering around. Like at a wedding reception. As I told the Gazette previously, I know from working in the love industry for over 40 years that what most normal people are thinking about when they are doing their weekly shop is sex, not kids.”
The brand new play area, a welcome distraction for shoppers’ offspring, features: swings, a roundabout, some springy horse things, and an ‘iconic’ ‘sperm-slide’ which is becoming a favourite.
No, you can’t have a Kinder egg.
Regular Pornofruit shopper, Gary from up the road told us: “Well I don’t have kids myself and when I’m shopping for a big peach to suck on the last thing. All I want is some chavvy woman’s snotty-nosed kid following me around whining about ‘mummy, mummy can I have Kinder egg?. I like to shop in peace, thank you very much, thinking about sex, and fruit, not shitty diapers.” I think the play area is fabulous. Keep them out of the way I say!”
Can you think of any more highly inappropriate amusements for a kids’ playground?
A clumsy hacker who accidentally stole some terrible songs by immigrant folk singer Ed Sheeran. Has been jailed despite some people saying he has been punished enough.
Ricky Kwarteng – no relation to Kwasi – mistakenly downloaded the tracks. While he was in fact trying to nab some unreleased recordings by his favourite band – 1970s easy-dreamers, The Carpenters.
Overruled!
The 21-year-old, from Alderton, East Suffolk admitted downloading the Sheeran numbers. But insisted he would never knowingly do such a thing as he believed the Framlingham-based singer’s music to be ‘Derivative commercial tripe. Which itself has been recycled from far superior classic artiste’s pre-existing work.’ When Sheeran’s lawyers objected to this in court, Judge Sir Robin Roth overruled.
Kwarteng’s defence lawyer told the court that having found himself with 14 unwanted such recordings. His client decided to “get rid of them as soon as possible on the dark web.” He eventually managed to do this raising a measly £25 in cryptocurrency. Hardly worth it.
Eating disorder hope
Hit 70’s sibling duo, The Carpenters, who sold over 90 million records and whose hits included: ‘Rainy Days and Mondays’. ‘Yesterday Once More’, and ‘Top of the World’ are officially the most stolen musical artist on the planet. This is put down to the fact that their music forms 65% of all vinyl LP’s held in charity shops across the UK. Well-known hangouts of skinflints, cheapskates, and kleptomaniacs.
Kwarteng, a trainee marble polisher with learning difficulties, admitted 4 charges. Including copyright infringement, not knowing how to spell ‘Jambalaya’, and possessing other people’s criminally bad-sounding property.
As technology continues to advance, motorists are now weighing up the decision to move from the more traditional, fuel-consuming cars to the vehicles of the future – electric cars.
As your block slowly starts to fill with more electric cars, and you start see them on the freeway, picking up great speeds yet almost whispering as they are driven, you might be wondering – how do I go about making the switch?
With many people looking into electric car insurance, there are many benefits of owning an electric car, from less fuel consumption to a much safer way of getting to your required destination, as well as the added benefit of trading your old gas car in for an electric one.
So, read on, as we discuss the top perks of driving an electric vehicle in 2022.
1 – Cheaper insurance
One of the perks of an electric car is the premium insurance on offer, as these types of cars tend to be safer, often having spacious interiors without compromising any of the features that a fuel vehicle has.
The Insurance Institute for Highway Safety (HIIS) has frequently sung the praises of how safe electric cars are.
The president of HIIS has said that: “It’s fantastic to see more proof that these vehicles are as safe as or safer than gasoline- and diesel-powered cars… we can now say with confidence that making the US fleet more environmentally friendly doesn’t require any compromises in terms of safety”.
While it might cost more to repair or replace parts for your electric car, the money you save on insurance premiums, due to their safety, can be better spent on maintenance.
2 – Help the fight against climate change
As well as having good insurance options, the switch to electric cars is also helping lower your carbon footprint.
Electric vehicles are better for the environment than their gasoline fuelled counterparts, and often the new models can be fully charged within an hour, saving yourself time and money.
The lower emissions reduce the amount of pollution in your area, not only making your block a more environmentally friendly place to live — benefitting your community — but your car won’t continue to age due to the fewer emissions.
3 – Plenty of choice
The surge of electric vehicles in recent times has meant there are a wide variety of options at your disposal.
Be it a plug-in, hybrid, or fully electric vehicle, there are lots of different models for you to select.
As freeways start to fill up with electric cars you might spot some of the most economic models, including the Škoda Enyaq, Renault Megane E-Tech and Audi E-Tron.
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The reality of the situation is that while fuel consumption of standard vehicles is still high, there are plans for a lot of companies to switch to fully electric models.
Plus, with states like California planning to phase out combustion engines by 2035, you may wonder is now the right time to get ahead of the curve and make the switch to an elective vehicle?
And with these top benefits of driving an electric car, there are plenty of reasons to the make change.
‘Leaky Sue Braverman’ costume for Halloween 2022 has become top sellerin the UK.
With Halloween coming up, what better way to scare the shit out of your family, mates, and the general public than to share sensitive national security information with terrorists?
That’s what ‘Leaky’ Sue Braverman, Home Secretary will be doing this 31st October and you can too! Come on pranksters! Play the ultimate terrifying prank by visiting your local joke shop… the one down the high street with all the coloured wigs, facemasks, costumes, and (inexplicably) smoking paraphernalia and air rifles.
Buy the new ‘Leaky Sue’ costume for Halloween (available in all sizes). Dress up like the careless and negligent politician. Who ‘was probed over a national security leak’ after she used her personal email account to spray around sensitive security information to her mates and other accidentally copied-in randoms.
Scary
The costume for Halloween, which comes in Tory blue and accentuates one’s ample bosom. Comes complete with your own ghastly private email server, free of restrictions enabling you to send top-secret intelligence documents. To your buddies without following the proper security protocols.
Also included is a gruesome retractable P45 allowing you to return to your previous employment within days of a humiliating resignation.
Tragic costume for Halloween
Completing the set is a handy private jet to Rwanda! Use this to deport those spooky failed asylum seekers and economic migrants. But watch out! Those other dreaded phantoms – the human rights campaigners – will be hiding around every corner, ready to jump out on you and f*ck you up just as you are about to depart!
So, don’t delay. Halloween is just days away! Get down to the joke store before ‘Leaky Sue’ is removed from the shelves… again.
In 2021, the global market size of the eSports industry was an astonishing $1,178 million, which does not include the revenue of correlated segments like paysafecard CSGO gambling, case opening platforms, and similar endeavors.
These numbers only demonstrate that the ever-growing popularity of different eSports leagues and in-game items like skins are changing the way people all over the world interact with iGaming.
The massive numbers of this novelty industry caught the attention of traditional educational entities, which are currently forming eSports professionals and experts.
The World of eSports Goes to College
As one of the UK’s first colleges to offer an eSports-related course, West Suffolk College developed a course called “Managing and Developing Esports,” a two-year course that grants a BTEC Level 3 Extended Diploma.
The course is directed to students who enjoy the competitive video gaming industry and demonstrate a genuine interest in progressing to higher education or a profession in the eSports field.
The initiative of West Suffolk College is a fundamental endeavor considering the importance of forming new professionals. During the course, students are exposed to a wide range of topics such as:
History of eSports
Live stream broadcasting
Shoutcasting
Video editing
Professional producing focused on eSports brands
eSports event management
Professional management of social media focused on eSports
Since its first edition, the course is publicly endorsed by the British eSports Association. During the outbreak of the pandemic, West Suffolk College continued to hold live stream sessions with prospective students to answer questions about the course.
Currently, the course is normally available for students, which can contact the institution using its official website.
A Brief Look at the West Suffolk College History & the Entity’s Interest for iGaming
Considered one of the UK’s most accomplished educational institutions focused on Further Education, West Suffolk College offers several courses ranging from vocational and technical courses to apprenticeships.
The entity also offers several bachelor’s degree courses and higher apprenticeships accredited by the University of East Anglia, a traditional public research university with nothing less than three Nobel laureates among its alumni history.
Currently, the institution has over 12,000 students enrolled in different educational courses and programs.
Since 2020, the entity has been involved in a series of talks focused on eSports themes. The purpose of these talks is to introduce students to the eSports universe and help them potentially find careers in the segment.
The endeavor offers students the chance to participate in talks with speakers such as Guild, NUEL, G2, Hitmarker, and other eSports experts.
According to the eSports course director Benjamin Lewis, the course brought a great impact on the eSports scene at the educational level. Lewis stated that “back when we started, we were literally the pioneers. I think there were about 8 or 9 colleges that were sort of looking at this.”
Why the eSports Industry Needs More Educational Programs?
While the eSports industry is growing massively in recent years, the supply of professionals with the required skills to make it work is experiencing a rising shortage.
This unique industry has been growing steadily and positioning itself as one of the main players in the ranking of the most profitable segments in the global sports and entertainment industry.
The segment was one of the few that suffered the least from the pandemic, registering a percentual decrease in revenue numbers of only 1.09% in 2020 compared to the previous year, from US$ 957.5 million to US$ 947.1 million.
Merchandising and professional events make up a good portion of the total revenue generated by the industry. Unlike the world of real-world sports, a considerable share of the revenue obtained from the sale of in-game items is directed to the competitive teams.
Further Education vs. eSports – How a British College is Revolutionizing the Concept
Since 2020, UK-based West Suffolk College offers an educational course focused on eSports called “Managing and Developing Esports.” This novelty had a massive impact on the educational scene, as other institutions also showed interest in adopting a similar approach.
Forming future eSports professionals was never so promising, especially as the audience numbers keep growing globally year after year. Currently, the industry expects to reach 646 million viewers in 2023.
Innumerate, lazy mum reveals how she lays TINFOIL on the dinner table and gets family to eat with hands to save energy amidst cost-of-living crisis.
Struggling Suffolk mum-of-six, Becky Curly, has shared her novel life hacks and cash-saving tips with online followers.
The craziest one – serving lunches and dinners on a tinfoil-covered tabletop without plates and cutlery – is designed to save money on the cost of running her dishwasher. Curly, says she got the idea from new PM, Rishi Sunak whose family is also believed, as is the tradition in Indian culture, to have eaten dinners with their hands. The method is a bit like unfurling a giant packed-lunch and spreading it all over the table.
Questionable economics – Curly & Sunak
Whether or not the numbers add up in the way that the lazy, innovative mum and the new PM think, has not yet been tested. So let’s take a closer look…
Curly/Sunak method:
Sainsbury’s Trust Catering TinFoil 366mm x 60m (£6.50 or 11p p/m) 2 metre table covering = 22p
Cost of washing hands before and after eating (presumably) for a family of eight (16 x 7p per basin of hot water = £1.12
Soap (estimate) = 2p
Total energy / raw material cost of the Curly/Sunak method: £1.36 per meal.
Dishwasher method:
Dishwasher energy cost per load (19p per kWh) = 22p
1 x dishwasher tablet = 14p
Total energy / raw material cost of the dishwasher method: 36p per meal.
Don’t be so lazy, wash it by hand method:
Cost per large sink of hot water = 21p
Soap (estimate) = 5p
Total energy / raw material cost of the Don’t be so lazy, wash it by hand method: 26p per meal.
Everyone’s happy with TINFOIL
So there we have it. True austerity demands that mums shouldn’t be so lazy and just wash the dishes by hand. Even better than that, dad can take the money saved by the wife’s manual dishwashing down to Gluttons singles bar in Halesworth, to buy drinks for his new ex-wife. Perfect!
Camping is one of the most exciting winter activities you can do with your children. Winter camping allows you to explore the wilderness and a variety of outdoor environments.
When it comes to camping in the winter, there are a few things to keep in mind to ensure that your trip is both pleasant and enjoyable. If you plan a winter camping trip, you will want to ensure that you are in a safe environment.
Camping in the winter requires more work than camping in the summer, but it also offers some exciting opportunities. There’s a chance that the additional work you put in to stay alive will be enjoyable. You can have a fun and exciting camping experience even when it’s freezing outside. You’ll reap many rewards if you’re willing to do the work.
Camping in the cold doesn’t have to be boring. You’ll be able to have a fun winter camping trip with your family if you keep the following tips in mind.
Checklist for a successful camping
– Think about the weather
It would be beneficial to consider the weather conditions before going on a camping trip with your family. For example, while camping in the winter will almost certainly involve being outside in cold temperatures and snowy terrain, you will want to ensure that this environment is safe for your children.
– A good quality tent
When going on a camping trip during the winter, one of the things you will want to make sure you have is a good tent. A sturdy tent will provide you with a secure place to sleep at night.
There are many tents available that are made of durable materials and are also waterproof. Purchasing a high-quality tent will provide the necessary equipment to keep you safe from the elements during your downtime.
– Sleeping bags
Sleeping gear will be a top priority during your camping trip. You’ll want to get two sleeping bags to stay warm at night. The double sleeping bags will provide you with an additional layer as well as additional comfort.
– First aid
Aside from having an adequate food supply, anyone planning a camping trip should also gather first aid supplies and learn basic techniques. Then, in the event of an injury, you can treat it immediately with the appropriate items and methods.
– Layers of clothing
When you go camping in the winter, you’ll want to keep yourself and your children warm. Wearing multiple layers of clothing is an excellent way to stay warm while camping. It is especially critical for your children.
– Food provisions
Having an adequate supply of food is vital when going on a winter camping trip. You will need enough meals for you and your children depending on how many days you plan to spend on the trip. It’s a good idea to get canned food so you can easily open it and start eating.
Plan your winter camping activities
When planning a winter camping trip, include activities that you and your children will enjoy. Make sure that these activities are both enjoyable and safe for your children. You can also add some adventurous activities for yourself in your planning.
– Make an igloo
Building an igloo can keep you surprisingly warm and insulated against the snow and wind, allowing you to spend more time outside.
– Cross-country skiing, horseback riding, and snowshoeing
The best fall camping in Michigan provides one-of-a-kind experiences available only at this time of year. Head to great outdoors of Michigan to snowshoe or cross-country ski in a fresh snowfall that has blanketed the rugged terrain.
– Winter nature watching
Even when camping in the great outdoors, it is easy to take the natural beauty for granted as we set up and maintain the campsite. However, a great activity to help us truly appreciate and enjoy nature is simply sitting and enjoying the winter landscape.
– Snow tubing
It is an activity meant for the enjoyment of the entire family can enjoy during winter camping on a hillside.
– Ice fishing
Ice fishing is an excellent activity to enjoy while winter camping. You might also get a bonus by catching your dinner.
– Game time
Board games are a great way to unwind on a lazy afternoon at your campsite, brighten up a rainy night, or quench your thirst for adventure when you can’t get out on the trail.
– Take a walk
Taking a walk in the calmness of nature is a great way to spend time with friends and family while enjoying the great outdoors. You want the hike to be as enjoyable as possible, and everyone is happier when their bellies are full. Bring extra food and water with you so that you and your family can enjoy their reconnecting time on this nature adventure.
– Treasure hunt
Scavenger hunts are a popular way to keep your children entertained at the campsite, especially if they are bored or restless. A scavenger hunt is a well-known and popular game that can be adapted easily to match the surroundings and interests of participants.
– Make a campfire
It’s no secret that we enjoy having a campfire and cooking over it. They’re cosy, fun, and magical and add a sense of adventure to our camping. Involving children in campfire activities is the best way to have family time while teaching them about fire safety.