Saturday, July 13, 2024

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Extinction Rebellion fails to stop Suffolk Gazette distribution

Extinction Rebellion campaigners admitted today they had been unable to halt the distribution of the Suffolk Gazette.

Although XR protests outside press plants owned by Rupert Murdoch prevented copies of The Sun and The Times from reaching readers, the Suffolk Gazette carried on as normal.

Suffolk Gazette spokesperson Lorraine Fisher, 34, said the climate change activists had failed to locate the pub from which the Suffolk Gazette editor was operating today.

“The Suffolk Gazette production process involves beer and no small amount of ‘let’s press publish and see what happens’.

“Extinction Rebellion may have tried to disrupt our production today, but the editor is already four pints in, and the presses continue to roll. In his head at least.

“But here we are, publishing a story as normal on a Saturday morning.”

As most sensible people read the Suffolk Gazette online, no trees were harmed producing this newspaper, and no fossil fuels were set on fire to send a fleet of vans to deliver it to your door.

However, there are concerns from Extinction Rebellion that the editor is full of hot air, particularly after ten pints and a curry.

Why not by an eco-friendly mug?

The Suffolk Gazette’s mugs are very eco friendly because they are not made from coal. Instead, they are quality ceramic mugs with funny designs added to them. You can buy one at Dirty Old Goat or click on one you fancy below…

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