Tuesday, May 28, 2024

Council apologised after drawing ‘Two Lines around Pothole’

Council apologised after drawing 'Two Lines on the Dirt'
Council decorates pothole with 2 cute yellow lines

East Suffolk council issued a groveling & insincere apology to local residents after painting double yellow lines around a big pothole. we felt we had to report the story. Apologies.

Who has ever met a conscientious council workman? Perhaps you’re married to one? I doubt it! In my 15 years of reporting for the Suffolk Gazette, I’ve never met one. In my experience, council labourers are lazy buffoons who consider an honest day’s work to be one endless 8 -hour tea break, interspersed with laughable attempts to relay the Sun newspaper’s daily headline, as though they understand it. If it’s not tits and arses, it’s casual, excusable racism, motoring… or football.

Wouldn’t it be good if they could just get on with their work in a timely fashion so that the rest of us don’t have to be waylayed by their unending lackadaisical ineptitude?

Dream on

Take, for example, the dickweeds who were regrettably tasked with painting two straight yellow lines on some tarmac in a run-down neighborhood of Ipswich last Tuesday morning. After turning up six hours late, laden with excessive amounts of bacon sarnies and sausage and onion rolls, and then having a game of cards, and a thirty-minute piss break, the three moronic, beer-gutted slobs finally got their paintbrushes out. Faced with the mild obstacle of a small, 3-foot pothole – completely unresembling the moon craters experienced by the astronauts of Apollo 11 – the working class turds basically gave up. There was no discussion, no consideration, no plan. Just an extra sensory agreement that the problem would be ‘worked around’ rather than fixed. FFS.

This country & Potholes

Not long after the useless workmen departed the scene of the crime against refinishing, the inevitable complaints began to pour into the county council and the office of the Suffolk Gazette. Sadly, we’ve seen and heard it all before, and having accepted that shit council workers are just a normal part of British life, we were reluctant to cover the story.

Good god. When will this nightmare end? We already covered a story where Council filled plants into potholes.

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