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Man given bicycle for Christmas still not home for his tea

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By Bernie Legge, Cycling Correspondent

A middle-aged man who was given a new bicycle for Christmas has been playing on it so much that he has not yet come in for his tea.

Excited Steve Walshe, 46, has been riding up and down his road in Woodbridge, Suffolk while proclaiming it was “the best Christmas ever”.

His long-suffering partner Lorraine Fisher, 34, bought him the bike after he pestered her all year for a new toy.

And Steve insisted he got all the gear to go with his slick speed machine, and now wears lycra shorts, top and a funny-looking helmet.

Sometimes he even wears them in bed.

Lorraine said: “He couldn’t wait to take the bike out on the road. I told him to be careful of the traffic, and to come in as soon as it got dark.

“But he was having so much fun he just kept going up and down the road for hours on end.

“The bike has 16 gears but he only seems to be using one of them – I expect he’ll get used to it soon.”

Lorraine said BT worker Steve had missed his tea repeatedly because he is playing on his bike so much.

“He’s having fun, so that’s the main thing,” she said.

“I suppose it’s quite harmless, but the neighbours have remarked he is a little old to be playing outside for so long on his own.”

Steve was unable to comment as he was busy attaching a bit of cardboard to his back wheel with a clothes peg so his bicycle would sound like a motorbike.

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Mystery surrounds best-selling Suffolk Christmas toy

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Mystery Christmas gift

Retailers have given the Suffolk Gazette a tantalising glimpse of the county’s best-selling toy this Christmas.

But to save ruining the big day for tens of thousands of local children, they have kept the mystery toy in its wrapping paper.

Lorraine Fisher, 34, of the Suffolk Retail Consortium, said: “It’s been a case of jingle tills this year as parents have been splashing out on the best-selling Christmas toy for girls and boys of all ages in Suffolk.

“It’s certainly quite a big gift, but it comes in surprisingly cheap at around £170,000. We’ve kept it wrapped for our press release photograph, however, because we don’t want to spoil the surprise for so many youngsters on Christmas morning.”

Staff say the toy is too big for Santa to get down the chimney, but it can be left outside in the road.

Can you guess what the mystery present is? A skateboard, perhaps? Or is it the latest Xbox? Leave your guess in on our Facebook page. The best answer will win absolutely nothing.

Meanwhile, retailers in Norfolk have confirmed that their best-sellers this Christmas continue to be the Wolf Fleece, and pairs of six-fingered gloves.

First look at the new Vaccine Passport accepted by nightclub doormen

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new vaccine passport
New vaccine passport to get past doormen

The Suffolk Gazette can today reveal the new Vaccine Passport that will allow clubbers to get past strict nightclub door security.

Bouncers up and down the country have received special training to accept the new Passports that give young people the right to enjoy themselves.

Passport designer and clubbing fan Lorraine Fisher, 34, said: “The new Vaccine Passport is a cool design that is recognised everywhere throughout the UK.

“You simply take it out and hand it to the doormen and, voila, in you go.

“It eliminates any need for confusion.”

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Mum starts cooking the Christmas sprouts

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A Suffolk mum has confirmed she has today put the sprouts on to ensure they are done in time for Christmas.

With just over a week to go until the big day, Lorraine Fisher, 34, doesn’t want her Christmas dinner ruined by a crunchy vegetable.

“You can never be too careful when it comes to preparing and cooking the sprouts. They are the centrepiece of any festive fayre, after all,” said Ms Fisher, from Framlingham.

“So, I washed and peeled them last night and then put them on the hob first thing this morning, with some carols playing quietly in the background on Alexa.

“They will now simmer away for nine days and be perfect for the big reveal.”

Long-suffering partner Steve Walshe, 43, will, unfortunately, be sucking up his liquidized Christmas dinner through a straw.

He is still recovering from a broken jaw suffered last year when he gently suggested to Ms Fisher that the sprouts were “a little soft”.

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Why the best casino experience in Ipswich is online

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The prospect of a casino in Ipswich being built has been spoken about many times, but something substantial is yet to happen. This has left anyone who wants to play slots and casino games in a bit of a rut.

But these days there’s a clear solution: online casinos. Thanks to fast internet on both computers and mobiles, players from Ipswich (and all over the UK) can access online casino sites at any time in just a few seconds. And these sites have a lot of advantages over traditional casinos too. With the help of Casino Professor – an award-winning UK casino comparison site – we explain what the benefits are of going online.

Variety

One of the great things about online casinos is the variety. There are literally hundreds of different websites which you can access from Ipswich (or elsewhere in the country) to play. So if you get bored with one particular site, you can simply move on to another.

But this doesn’t just provide players with new surroundings. Some casino sites provide different kinds of features, so you can actually choose one that better fits your needs. For example, some sites have a lot more slots and games available. Others have different types of payment methods to use. You might decide to go for an instant withdrawal casino UK to access any winnings quickly.

All players have different kinds of preferences. And online casinos are best suited to meet those needs.

Convenience

As we mentioned above, you can access an online casino within seconds using your mobile phone, laptop, or tablet. They’re also open 24 hours a day. This means you don’t really need to plan anything in advance.

Compare this to land-based casinos. They sometimes have limited opening hours and you have to actually think about getting there. This is especially tricky for the people of Ipswich as there isn’t a traditional casino in town. The nearest is probably Grosvenor in Great Yarmouth which is around an hour’s drive away. So it’s a pretty big commitment just to even get there.

But with online casinos, all you need is an internet connection. So you can start to play pretty much whenever it suits you.

Rewards

When you sign up to be a member at a land-based casino, you might get a few rewards. But they probably won’t have anything to do with playing the games. Things like free soft drinks and maybe a bit of food, for example.

Online casinos give players rewards to play their slots and games. You will almost certainly be given a bonus when you sign up and make your first deposit. This usually gives you a bit more bankroll to play with as a thank you for playing with your own money. And because there’s loads of variety, you can literally benefit from a first deposit bonus at pretty much all casino sites.

But that’s not all. Existing players frequently get things too. These sites don’t want you to sign up with one of their competitors, so they provide you with more promotions to keep you happy.

Games

If you’ve never played at an online casino before then you might not think there’s much difference between their slots and games and those available at land-based casinos. But often there is.

Land-based casinos obviously have a limited amount of space. Even the biggest ones in the UK can only fit so many slot machines, blackjack tables, roulette wheels, and poker tables through the door.

But because online casinos offer virtual games, they do not have any of these restrictions. Instead, they can choose to partner with as many third-party game providers as they like. The more providers they partner with, the more slots and games they can offer to players. Of course, the game providers they can partner with must have a licence to operate in the UK, with the Gambling Commission deploying strict rules on gaming machines to ensure they are fair and comply with their standards.

In general, online casinos really should be offering at least a few hundred games. Some sites have been known to provide over a thousand. And the number of games just keeps on rising too. That’s because most providers release something new every month. So there’s always something different to try out even if you’ve been playing on the same site for years.

So when you add all of this up, it’s quite hard to ignore the benefits of playing online. Even in places where land-based casinos are actually present, but especially in Ipswich where no traditional casinos are available.

If you do decide to play, just make sure to always gamble responsibly and keep it fun.

How can I reverse the signs of ageing?

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Growing old may be a natural part of life, but that doesn’t mean that you have to like it. Noticing the signs of ageing in your body is usually not a sudden thing. It is unlikely that you will wake up one morning to wrinkles and other problems. These changes can be quite gradual, from aches and pains slowly getting worse, to decreased energy, lower metabolism, and even fine lines becoming more and more prominent.

While you may not have a lot of control over some of these aspects, others may be able to be changed through medical intervention, or even by adjusting some of the choices you make throughout each day.

Seeking help from a surgeon to reverse the signs of ageing can be a possibility, especially if you have a pool of savings, or the ability to save up in future. Many people find that they gain youthful results from a mini face lift, without the need for a fully invasive procedure. This may be of most use to those who have noticed the earlier signs, such as finer lines, less elasticity in the skin or even sagging in the face. You could then opt to have further treatments on your face at the same time, or simply see how much of a change is made with this single procedure once the healing time is complete.

The unhealthy habits in your life could also be making you age prematurely. One of the biggest contributors to this can be smoking. It is believed that those who smoke may look a decade or two older than they actually are. Wrinkles may also become more prominent a lot quicker than in someone who abstains from this habit. While quitting smoking may not undo all of the damage that you have done to your body, both inside and out, over time you may notice these effects lessening, and that any future signs take significantly longer to become noticeable. Those who smoke heavily, or have trouble with willpower, might benefit from seeking assistance from their GP or local smoking cessation service, rather than attempting to quit on their own.

Adequate hydration can also be crucial to looking younger. Proper fluid intake can help the skin to retain its elasticity and glow, as well as plump out areas and reduce the appearance of wrinkles. However, it is estimated that approximately 90% of people do not drink enough water, meaning they are missing out on its benefits. In addition to this, drinking water can help with the internal workings of your body too, so you may be feeling older both inside and out.

While you may not be able to turn back the hands of time, there are things you can do to achieve an illusion of a younger-looking body. By looking at viable treatments and options, as well as opting for healthier alternatives each day, you could retain your youthful glow for longer.

4 ways to improve employee satisfaction

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Money only goes so far, even for well-paid employees. Job satisfaction is actually a leading cause of employee turnover. If you want to retain your staff and make your business a wonderful place to work, it’s important to prioritize not only performance but company culture.

What do you contribute to each worker’s life at the end of the day? Are they there solely to do a job, or do they gain more than a paycheck from their contributions to your business? To help you build a stronger company, prevent employee burnout and improve your workspace, here are five ways to start boosting job satisfaction among your team.

Identify immediate risks

There are workplace risks that seem to be lurking behind the scenes, usually unnoticed by management but extremely stressful for workers. This could be lack of communication, lack of appreciation, failure to recognize achievement or limited to zero growth opportunities. Physical hazards that contribute to low satisfaction include poor lighting, cramped or uncomfortable workspaces and low-quality office furniture.

Make sure that you create a physical and emotional environment that is healthy and enjoyable. People shouldn’t walk into the office and immediately be counting down the minutes until they can leave. A healthy work life balance means enjoying your time in the office for its own sake, not willing it away to get home and destress.

Improve fleet management

Drivers power a large part of your business, but what is their work environment like? Too many business owners forget that their drivers’ real job satisfaction comes from what they encounter on the road. There are many ways you can improve your employees’ experience, starting with greater fleet management and safety features. One option worth considering is AI dash cams. Powered by artificial intelligence, these do far more than improve drivers’ visibility behind the wheel. In-cab coaching and real-time incident detection allow your drivers to perform better and drive safer while improving your business’s bottom line.

Give employees a voice

Ask employees what they would like to see out of the company. After all, they make it what it is. Their input matters, and they should feel like their thoughts, concerns and needs are valued. Regular team meetings can help you work together to assess changes that need to be made. Collaborating to come up with solutions that leave everyone happy is equally important. Don’t just listen and come up with your own ideas. Everyone should feel onboard and included as they work to make their office environment better.

Offer greater flexibility

There are so many innovative employee perks to consider in terms of improving satisfaction levels. Consider allowing people to customize their work schedules and even take their jobs remote part- or full-time. If someone is struggling with a long commute, consider allowing them to start their day an hour later or leave a bit earlier. Flexibility gives employees a greater sense of autonomy in their careers. Even if they love the work they do, no one wants to feel like they’re forced to work a certain way with zero chance to compromise. Remember, this is their job, so they deserve some say in how they do it. So long as they are able to perform their role and contribute meaningfully to the company, there is no harm in allowing some modifications to their schedule or work environment.

Revealed: new lockdown rules for Suffolk

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We can today reveal the full extent of new lockdown rules for Suffolk.

The regulations vary from one area to the next, so residents are urged to take note of how they are affected by reading the full guide below.

Haverhill

It’s still ok to fight with your neighbour as long as you wear a mask and social distancing rules are adhered to. You may still wear your pyjamas, dressing gowns and slippers when venturing outside.

Ipswich

Burgling homes in your local area is still permitted as long as you sanitise correctly. Track and trace technology must be used, however, so you might wish to think about another way to raise some Christmas cash.

Bury St Edmunds

You can only visit your dealer when dropping your kids off at school. Dealers must wear visors and sanitise all bags. Elderly folk are still allowed to tut loudly at everyone in the street.

Mildenhall

You can still have close contact with your cousin, but you must wash your hands, wear a mask and be home by 10 pm.

Newmarket

Only vigilante groups of six people are permitted outdoors between the hours of 10pm and 6am. Personal protective clothing must be worn during physical contact and raves.

Lowestoft

Sitting in the park is encouraged but please note, although a bottle of White Lightning has higher alcohol content than hand sanitiser, it is not a suitable substitute.

Sudbury

Vice businesses will still be permitted to stay open as an essential service. Closing these premises would risk an economic collapse in the area.

Stowmarket

Slowmarket

Is now classed as a ‘NO GO ZONE’. If you must travel through this area please follow all diversions, stay in your car at all times. Masks are not required as nothing is open.

Lavenham

All middle-class, drug-fueled swinging orgies must adhere to the rule of six. Masks must be worn. Gimp masks are deemed suitable for this purpose.

Felixstowe

Flashing your genitalia on the pier is permitted strictly between 9am and 10am only. Sterile gloves must be worn at all times, and anyone found flashing outside of these hours will be quarantined in the seal sanctuary for 14 days.

Hadleigh and Long Melford

Photo: Joakim Jardenberg under CC

Barbour face masks to match your coat must be worn in Hadleigh, Long Melford and all other areas close to Constable Country. Sticking your head up your own arse is also an acceptable form of face covering and applies to all towns and villages in this quadrant of Suffolk.

Clare

No need to wear a mask or self-isolate; COVID can’t find your house.

Brandon

So close to Norfolk that it’s too risky for anyone to leave home ever again.

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