Lowestoft Bans Chainsaws from Beaches After Blood-Soaked Maniac Menaces Beachgoers
Charles of Arabia: King to star in epic desert remake
Banksy knocks one out in Ipswich
Hand ball! Ronaldo admires wife’s ‘soccer ball bottom’
Notting Hill carnival – Cop gets helmet squashed by rasta raver
Stab-proof vests: London’s new school uniform
What exactly does the United Kingdom smell like?
Pakefield Building contractor’s wife is B.J. Champion
Bit of a squash at McDonalds as fans chew over new McMallow Burger
RSPCA turns a blind eye to high street ‘cat eye removals’ at Pets at Home
Slow death awaits bored residents of Acton, Suffolk
Amazon business idea turns to sawdust
Thomas the Tank Engine – The beloved blue locomotive of children’s TV fame, has been reportedly kidnapped
Elton John hires Suffolk tiler to revamp back passage
United Kingdom in decline: Time to ‘switch off and plug it back in’
Guns ‘n’ hoses: Army refuels tank battalion at Sainsbury’s petrol pump
Flying blind: British Airways to fund 200 blind and partially sighted trainee pilots in unprecedented diversity drive
Leeds Roma vandals make a mess of community relations
Who’s Next for England Football Coach? A Lineup of Legendary Losers
Deep shag on special offer at C*nty Carpet shop
High hopes for Refugee Olympic Team’s pole vaulters
