Artichoke hearts, cappuccino mousse and curd cheese have sold out across Waitrose stores as well-heeled shoppers panic over coronavirus fears.
Shelves were cleared of posh grub as customers attempted to stock up for grim weeks of self-isolation.
It is feared lobster, avocado, houmous and quark will also be sold out in Waitrose within hours.
Frustrated shopper Lorraine Fisher, 34, said: “I woke up in a panic yesterday when I realised I only had two cans of artichoke hearts left in the larder.
“I went to my local Waitrose and they had sold out. People were wandering around in tears. How are we supposed to cope now?
“Someone said Lidl had artichoke hearts but I won’t be seen dead in there, and I doubt they sell curd cheese.”
It is not known when Waitrose bosses will get more of the tasty, spiny vegetables in stock.
Meanwhile, sales of the Daily Mail continue to soar because everyone has run out of toilet roll.
Pro Tip to Waitrose shoppers: hoard tonic water (any brand). Better still, keep the anti-malarial tablets Jemima was prescribed for her trekking in Borneo and Dad’s rheumatism medication. If you can’t do any of this, buy any medication containing the letter Q.
What bollocks, get a grip poshies 😂
My Lidl only has fresh artichokes and definitely does have curd cheese !