Irish football team’s dignity stuck in Suez Canal

Ireland dignity stuck in Suez Canal
Ireland’s dignity is stuck in the Suez Canal

The Irish national football team’s dignity is stuck in a container in the Suez Canal, it has emerged.

Players who inexplicably lost 1-0 at home to tiny Luxembourg in a World Cup qualifier had hoped the embarrassment would not last long.

But now logistics experts have confirmed the team’s dignity is stuck in a container on board the EverGreen ship, which ran aground in the Suez Canal, causing chaos.

The dignity is not expected to reach Ireland for many more weeks.

Luxembourg, ranked 98th in the world, won 1-0 in Dublin on Saturday night, virtually ending Ireland’s chances of making it to the next World Cup.

Shipping expert Lorraine Fisher, 34, explained the Irish team will take longer than hoped to get over the shock defeat.

“Unfortunately, the Irish team’s dignity is stuck on a ship in the Suez Canal and will take many more weeks to make it to Ireland.

“The players will just have to be ridiculed for much longer than they had hoped.”

She explained the container of dignity had been loaded in China, alongside lots of goods destined for Amazon, like new lawnmowers.

Meanwhile, England showed how to dispatch of footballing minnows, thrashing San Marino 5-0 on Thursday.

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