Tuesday, April 2, 2024

Eggsluts prefer ‘easy-lay’ eggs

Eggsluts prefer ‘easy-lay’ eggs

I like eggs. Eggs on toast, egg and chips, boiled eggs etc. Does that make me an eggslut?

Well, let’s see…

We all know what an egg is, and the word ‘slut’ actually describes a woman with low standards of cleanliness. Quite why a man (or a transgender for that matter) with low standards of cleanliness doesn’t qualify is not made clear. So an ‘eggslut’ is, let’s say… a person with low standards of cleanliness in respect of their relationship with eggs.

Slutty side up

I don’t know about you, but when I cook eggs, there is usually some residual mess involved. A pan with some escaped albumen burnt to the outside edge, some butter spatter up the tiled hob surround, and some cooked albumen stuck harder than Gorilla glue to the edge of the egg slice. And all that is before I even try to flip the egg. So on the basis of hygiene, I am definitely an eggslut.

Over-easy-lay eggs

However, whether or not I would invest millions of dollars in a restaurant chain based on my sloppy egg-making is a different matter entirely, but that is exactly what the proprietors of the international food chain ‘eggslut’ did – with great success. Founded in New York city in 2017, eggslut has been pleasing its egg-loving clientele with its signature dish “The Slut”, a coddled egg on pureed potatoes, as well as numerous artisan egg sandwiches such as ‘the Fairfax’, a cage-free soft scrambled egg, chive, cheddar cheese and onion sanger with sriracha mayo in a warm brioche bun. Mmmmm!

However you like your eggs, we can agree that no amount of them is too much. And just like a woman who enjoys sex, dirty or otherwise, with one partner, or many, there is absolutely nothing wrong with being a slut.

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