Friday, December 6, 2024

Sexy spectral seductress scandalises Suffolk skies

Sexy spectral seductress scandalises Suffolk skies

Ever looked up into the sky and seen a horse? What about a guitar? A lawnmower?

If the answer is yes, then you have either dropped a tab of LCD or you are suffering from pareidolia.

Pareidolia is the scientific term for the perception of familiar objects seen in random places, most famously in the tea leaves at the bottom of your teacup. Recognizing shapes or famous faces in the branches of a tree or in cloud formations is a common phenomenon.

Have you guessed what it is yet?

The word ‘pareidolie’ was first phrased by the 19th Century German psychiatrist, Karl Ludwig Kahlbaum in his paper ‘On Delusions of the Senses’ after he saw what he believed to be the arse of Theodoric the Great in a half-eaten jam doughnut. Dead celebrity paedophile and amateur artist, Rolf Harris, suffered from pareidolia from the age of five when he was first diagnosed with having three legs.

So when, on a long afternoon out boozing with his mates, Brian Festoon, 57, a retired cheese grater from Tannington in mid-Suffolk, looked up into the open skies above the Greengrocer’s Arms, and saw the image of a beautiful naked woman drawn out in the clouds, he knew straight away that he had a touch of the Pareidolias.

Cloudy boob

Dropping his pint of Rosie’s Pig cloudy cider, and reaching into his jeans pocket, Brian pulled out his phone and fumbled with it until he had engaged its camera mode. Carefully aiming the lens at the whispy seductress above him, he snapped the shutter and captured the most perfect rendering of an altocumulus arse ever seen by a human man.

Nothing lasts forever though, and before Brian’s mates could make it outside, the vapoury vixen had dissipated and dispersed across the breadth of the hazy Suffolk Sky. Apparently, one of her tits was spotted over Framlingham later that afternoon.

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