Monday, July 22, 2024

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Suffolk pub found to have no artisan gin menu

Artisan gin menu

A customer has found the only pub in Suffolk that does not have a pretentious artisan gin menu, it has emerged.

Allison Hughes, 27, stumbled across the Horse and Hound in Woodbridge and was delighted to see only normal gin behind the bar.

“Suffolk’s publicans seem to think we all want fancy artisan gin with twatty names and bizarre ingredients dreamt up by hipsters who wear no socks and grow silly moustaches.

“If I want a gin and tonic I am happy to buy one of the well-known brands behind the bar, mainly because I am desperate for a drink and all gins taste the same anyway.

“I do not want to spend 30 minutes staring at a grandiose gin menu with 40 choices, fretting over whether to have Poetic Whimsy with locally-foraged botanicals, or Parson’s Nostril with sweet pepper and wild horseradish.”

The landlord of the Horse and Hound said: “We had one of those hipster types in here the other day wearing a silly waistcoat – it was the middle of June, for goodness sake.

“Anyway, he asked for my artisan gin menu and I told him we only serve Gordon’s but that I could put a pork pie in it to make it more interesting.

“He was very upset and flounced out.”

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