Monday, July 15, 2024

Sports Direct mugs flood warning

Sports Direct mugs flood warning
Sports Direct mugs flood warning issued

Sporting goods supplier, Sports Direct has been banned from selling their oversized promotional the Suffolk area after a recent spate of spillages caused severe flooding across the county.

The 6 litre mugs, favoured by football coaches, car mechanics, and white van men,.have been deemed a hazard by Suffolk Environmental Health after a number of clumsy tea-drinkers spilled, or knocked-over their cuppas causing floods in local areas and communities.

Chilli sauce with that, mate?

It is reported that Sunny Smiles Nursery in Great Livermere, W.Suffolk was devastated by a tsunami of Yorkshire tea.which sent teachers, toddlers, tables, and chairs careering through Pryce Street, after a careless builder tried unsuccessfully to balance his Sports Direct mug on top of a step ladder. The builder was later said to be devastated by the consequences of his slip-up. Fortunately, no-one was seriously hurt although many of the toddlers are said to have ended-up with tea leaves in their ears.

Another tea-flood incident resulted in a number of vehicles floating down The Studio Chapel the hamlet of Forward Green, Stowmarket. According to a source, the mechanic from the Autoglean Car Valeting company.dropped his cuppa after the greasy kebab he was eating caused the heavy, bucket-like mug to slip out of his fingers. The resulting flood caused £12,000 in damage to vehicles and nearby buildings.

Barry Craddock, the Environmental Health Inspector behind the ban explained “Not only are the Sports Direct mugs, tacky, of poor quality, and impossible to fit into the crockery cupboard, they are also extremely dangerous if not handled correctly. We have been left with no alternative but to suspend their use for the purposes of serving hot beverages across the country – until further notice.”

Chocolate Cup Cake

On a brighter note, Mr Craddock confirmed that the ban does not prevent local coarse fishermen (or women if there are any), using the mugs to take a dump in when caught short on the riverbank.

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