LOWESTOFT — In a legal first, a five-year-old boy has been hit with six points on his future driving licence after being caught riding an electric scooter at “high speeds.”
By Our Crime Editor: Rob Banks
The pint-sized speedster was hauled before Lowestoft Magistrates’ youth court in December after Cleveland Police apprehended him tearing through the streets on his high-powered Christmas gift. Sources describe the child as “unrepentant but surprisingly well-balanced for his age.”
Driving Licence Points
PC Kevin Dickhead of the Lowestoft Neighbourhood Policing Team addressed the shocking incident in a solemn statement. “These scooters are not toys,” he warned sternly. “They’re essentially unregistered Formula 1 cars for toddlers. Parents need to understand the legal and safety implications.”
Poor Kid
The five-year-old, who cannot legally hold a licence for another 12 years, will now begin his motoring career saddled with six points—a handicap that puts him one speeding ticket away from a lifetime ban before he’s old enough to parallel park.
Suffolk Police issued a further reminder to parents: “Electric scooters can reach speeds of up to 40mph and are illegal on roads, pavements, and cycle paths. The only place they belong is on authorised private land—or, apparently, the docket at youth court.”
The unnamed toddler declined to comment, but sources close to the family suggest he has since taken up more age-appropriate pursuits—like stock car racing on his PlayStation.
