Today’s horoscope: Rebekah Brooks

With Mystic Smeg

Rebekah Brooks, May 27. Gemini

The stars have aligned with The Sun to cap a remarkable comeback and seal your future as a multi-millionaire businesswomen.

And all because a mystery older man (he’s Australian, so not too hard to guess who it is) continues to fall for your Gemini charms.

But you must tread the corridors of power carefully, as former and now current-again colleagues may be a little upset. With many Sun journalists still not back at work despite being cleared by juries, and one other having languished in jail after being abandoned by your team, some might think it odd you have returned unblemished.

However, your planetary movements show you will survive as you always have done, by talking out of Uranus great respect to everyone else around you.

House of the rising Sun: Rebekah Brooks

Your week will improve further, because The Editor of the Suffolk Gazette would love an interview with you for his esteemed business pages. He tells me he’s left a message on his voicemail with the details.

So after being cleared of any phone-hacking-related trickery, you’re back where you belong. As if nothing had ever happened.

Who could have predicted that?

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One Response

  1. Leiston Tom September 3, 2015

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