My modern-day version of Harvest Festival favourite
Suffolk Police hunting green-fingered pervert
My crack is getting very big
I’m so sad about my small pear
I plumbed depths of bad taste with my outside toilet
Don’t worry if your onions poke out
Mr Chilcot blasts my lupins of mass destruction
New balls, please – why I’m feeling a bit forelorn
English slugs have destroyed my Brussels
In or out? I know what I like best
The men who made a packet from seeds
Get those wee jobs done around the veg patch
Water those herbs and find thyme for a right good stuffing
I’m growing for Gold at The Chelsea Flower Show!
Invasion of Norfolk garden pests
My impressive tulips are growing willy-nilly
It’s time for your dream erection
Grow your own ITFC garden
The gift that made my eyes water
Use your Noodle when potting up
Make your own water bottle
